Q: My husband left me a few months ago, and I’m just starting to date. What should I tell guys? –B.K., 26
A: Nothing. Everyone knows that switching on the Emotional History Channel too early is bad scheduling. I mean, would you turn to a guy during your first dinner and brightly confide, “My father treated my mother like garbage for thirty years, which explains my deep-seated mistrust of males, which a wide array of experts have assured me will last a lifetime! Are you getting an appetizer?”
Better to save those tantalizing gems about your fears, neuroses or most recent UFO sightings for when you two have bedrock to build on. A good guidepost: If you can fart in front of him without apology (sorry for using the word fart), you’re on sufficiently intimate ground. Which is not to imply that the first time you let one rip, you should scream out, “So I was married, OK? He left me! Happy now?” It simply means you want to reach a certain comfort level before you break the, uh, news.